Now and then hated myself more&more!

Just came back after school after finishing file-ing my science file... Wanted to wait for you, but decide not too. I'll grant you your wish, since you hate me waiting for you. So i'll leave. I'm stupid for doing such things. And i cant face you now... I feel so stupid... Luckily tmr is saturday, or else i would need to a letter to teacher for not attending to school...:/ Thanks for the lunch you prepared but, from now on you don't have to anymore. I wont ask. And i wont be texting you today, and maybe the few days after. I'm sorry... I took out the battery. I don't feel like texting anybody. I saw the hatered in your eyes... If you ask me to leave you for good, I would. Don't hesitate, if you really want. I don't wish to hurt you anymore like i've been doing. I wont stop you from talking or sms anyone from now on. I was a fool thinking that you are mine! I realise that i couldn't be all that selfish... If she wants to have you, garnt her, her wish. I wont stop you anymore. Through i really wish i could hold you tightly in my hands. But it's a wish, it'll never happen. I'm just a stupid fool who only knows how to cry alot. I've hurt you enough. Even if you deny, i know i did. I'm sorry. Unknowingly, i've hurt you so deeply. And what is this now?! My tears keep flowing down and my heart aches. I have the image of you and her. But, i wont say anything anymore, you got the freedom to befriend to whom ever you wish. I'm sorry. I know i can control my hands in not texting you cuz, i'll be eating sleeping pills, making sure i wont text you. Even if i'm like this, you wont be bothering. You got her now, teasure her. My friend tried to stop me but i ran away. Jealousy hurts, so does love.